Change

Of career path (again). Of jobs (hopefully). Of apartments (perhaps imminently). Of whether to be fruitful and multiply (more distantly; and more on that at a later date).

It's all adding up and the uncertainty is getting to me, a little.

Throw in that Matt's been gone for a week and law school finals are approaching, and...OK, it's getting to me kind of a lot.

I'm having renter's remorse about having given notice to our landlady, who now seems twice as eager to be rid of us as we are to be out of here (who would have thought?). All of a sudden the proximity to the subway and the fact that we're already here, coupled with the fact that I have heard nothing from the Reston hospital and thus so far have absolutely no obligation that awaits me there, are making me incredibly anxious that we're making the wrong move. That I'm going to be marooned out where there is little public transportation and I'm going to have to spend long hours in traffic, every day, to a job that's driving me up the wall.

I realize these aren't the world's most pressing concerns, but hey, this isn't the world's blog, either.

I'm worried that we're making the same mistake again--succumbing to the charms of a place (in DC's case, the culture and the experience of it; in Reston's case, its beckoning walkability, among other things) while not yet recognizing that its drawbacks (for DC, the crime and the noise and the inconvenience; for Reston, the hours a day I may well end up spending in traffic) are what we really should have thought about. The things that will wind up affecting us on a daily basis.

I recognize that I have brought this on myself, but that doesn't make all the uncertainty any easier to bear.